


Trench

by your_starless_eyes



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Trench - Twenty One Pilots (Album)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Blood, Cars, Death, Escape, Execution, Fire, Flowers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Graphic Description, Graphic Description of Corpses, Heavy Angst, Hugs, Inspired by Music, M/M, No Dialogue, Razors, Self-Harm, Silence, Suicide, Suicide Notes, Triggers, can be read as platonic or romantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-17 08:37:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15457458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/your_starless_eyes/pseuds/your_starless_eyes
Summary: When Phil Lester attempted to escape the city of silence, he never imagined failure as an option. Unfortunately, it was, and now it's his job to fix the mistakes he's made in hopes that others might make it. When the Banditos come back for him, though, he realises he's no longer content with Dema, and that he'll die trying to escape its restraining hold.*inspired by the Trench storyline by Twenty One Pilots*





	1. A Car

**Author's Note:**

> This probably isn't 100% accurate with the Trench storyline, but I tried to keep it close. 
> 
> I've been working all day on this; I really hope you guys like it. :)

Phil Lester peers over the burning sides of the car, a bit dizzy. He slowly hops out on to the ground, walking around the side and opening the boot. Inside is a bundle of olive coloured fabric- a jumpsuit. Phil pulls it on over his shirt, the yellow stripes across his shoulders familiar and bright. He sucks in a deep breath, nerves making his hands shake.

The car took him this far, but seeing as it's currently in flames, Phil is going to have to walk the rest of the way.

It'll take much longer to reach the edge of Dema this way, giving more chances for the Watchers to spot him.

***

Phil opens his eyes as he sits up, frowning at the thin layer of water around him. It must have rained somewhere further in the city, because the dry river bed Phil slept in (it sheltered him from the Watchers) now has water running through it. Standing slowly, Phil looks around, his blue eyes wide with curiosity and fear. He's further away from Dema than he's ever been, and a part of him yearns to run back.

 _No_ , he reminds himself. _Better to get out than stay trapped in silence._

Phil continues walking, and after a while he becomes aware of people watching him. He looks up to see the cliff's edges lined with people, each wearing jumpsuits streaked with yellow.

Banditos.

Phil feels no fear of them. If anything, their presence is comforting- he's close to escaping if they're near.

He keeps walking, ignoring their stares.

After several minutes, Phil hears something behind him. He turns, seeing a horse with a rider in a red cloak running towards him.

Phil freezes, fear rendering him immobile as the horse races up to him until it's close enough that he can feel its breath against his skin. He's surprised it didn't just trample him, but he's not complaining. Phil closes his eyes as the rider gets off, his red cloak flowing in the wind. Honestly, Phil is more afraid of the horse than the rider, but there's no denying the spark of anxiety that runs through him. Phil tilts his head back, exposing the pale skin of his neck as the man steps closer. Phil knows his name, but he wouldn't dare speak it. He may be foolish- look what he's done, for God's sake!- but he's not suicidal.

Phil lets out a shuddering breath as he feels Nico's fingers brush against his neck, leaving four lines, four black marks against his skin.

 _Issued by Dema: Failed Perimeter Escape_.

Phil can practically see the words on paper, filling him with shame.

He's been marked as a Bandito- a part of the rebel group aiming to escape the city. Worse still, he's now marked as one that couldn't even do that.

Phil watches silently as Nico climbs back onto his horse, the animal beginning to walk. He looks back at Phil, and Phil knows what he's meant to do.

It's a silent order, but one Phil can hear in his head loud and clear: _Follow me._

Phil casts a final glance up the cliffs, his eyes filling with tears. He was so close, but it's time to give up.  
It's time to return to the city and pray he'll be accepted back by the people.

Numbly, Phil follows Nico and his horse, his mind racing so quickly he can't even decipher his own thoughts. The longer they walk, the more saddened Phil becomes, until he's trudging through the rocky terrain with dragging feet, trying not to cry. He doesn't want to go back, not by a long shot, but what choice does he have?

Phil's eyes land on a small yellow flower growing on the dry ground, and he smiles sadly at it before looking up again at the cliffs above him.

This time, though, Phil stops, staring at the people above him with longing.

His eyes land on a man in a yellow bandana, his olive jumpsuit streaked with yellow- only slightly different than Phil's- Phil gasps quietly. Nico stops, looking back at him, silently urging Phil to come on, but he doesn't move.

Dan is there.

Dan and Phil continue to stare at each other for a bit, and then Dan reaches into his pocket and tosses something into the air. All around him, the other Banditos do the same, and it's only once the yellow flower petals flutter in front of Phil's face that he looks at Nico. The horse is rearing up in fear, and Phil is sure that beneath his cloak his stony face is contorted in confusion.

They can't see yellow.

Phil looks up at Dan one more time, and then he takes off, running as fast as he can over the rocky ground. Fear takes over as he hears horse hooves behind him, and Phil screams as he runs, water splashing over his boots and trousers. He doesn't care about getting wet- all that matters is getting to the perimeter and escaping the silence of the city of Dema.

Phil curses as he slips on the slick rocks, standing and taking off once more. He's short of breath- he regrets not working out more before this attempt- but he presses on. The city's edge is close, he can feel it.

He slips again, but this time his head connects with the hard ground. Phil groans, gasping for air as he tries to get back up, but he's too tired, too dizzy. Sucking in long, deep breaths, Phil doesn't move except to pick up a small yellow flower as Nico catches up to him.

He just closes his eyes, unable to resist as the man climbs off his horse and grabs his ankle, dragging him along the rough ground. Phil feels strangely at peace at the idea of returning to Dema, though. It is familiar, unlike what lies ahead of him.

Several metres above Phil, Dan Howell sighs sadly, shaking his head in disappointment.


	2. A Torch

_~before~_

Phil watches through the window, the city of Dema silent outside. It's home, but it doesn't change that he still feels uneasy about being here. The towers loom high above the streets, casting long shadows over them. Phil's fingers tighten around the stem of a small yellow flower as he walks away from the window, setting it in a box alongside several others. Each one symbolises the days he's planned this.

Phil runs his fingertips over the wooden dresser, his bottom lip between his teeth. He can't believe he's doing this. Idly, he rubs the skin of his neck, as if trying to remove the black marks that aren't there. They will be, though, if this goes wrong.

Phil shakes his head, willing the thought away.

If he's going to make a break for it, it has to be today, while everyone else in the city is at this... well, Phil doesn't really know what it is- just that Nico and the Niners ordered all citizens of Dema to be there. No one would dare ignore a direct order.

No one except the Banditos.

Phil licks his lips, his hands gripping the edge of his dresser tightly. He reaches up and pushes his hair back before grabbing a backpack off the floor and packing it.

The Banditos are a group of rebels- escapists, of sorts. The ones who fled Dema, who live above and away from the city.

The ones who are where Phil so desperately wants to be.

It's practically suicidal to try to escape, but Phil's always been a little crazy, always been a bit of a dreamer. It's what separates him from the rest of the city, what drew him to seek out the Banditos in the first place.

Phil hears the chimes of the clock tower, breaking the silence, and he pulls on the backpack over the top of his jumpsuit.

It's time.

***

Phil walks through the city streets in silence, his footsteps the only thing breaking it. In the distance, he hears footsteps that don't belong to him, the light of fire a bit further away. Phil swallows nervously, stopping. As the figures get closer, anxiety drives him to turn back, but there's flames coming closer from there as well.

So Phil stands in silence, waiting for the Banditos to come enough to see. They stop, forming a sort of wall- all except for one, who steps closer.

The Bandito in front of him is wearing a yellow bandana, but Phil recognises him even before he pulls it down.

Dan.

Phil grins and Dan returns it, offering his hand; they shake quickly before hugging. Dan hands Phil a single drumstick before holding up his own and gesturing towards a small drum one of the other Banditos has set on the ground. Phil nods, and together they hit it, the sound ringing loud and clear through the silent city. They do it again, again, again, until one of the others raises a hand. Dan pockets the stick, Phil does the same, and then the Banditos take off, walking briskly through the streets. Phil can't help but feel guilty as he sees people- those who were physically unable to go to tonight's meeting- slam their windows and doors shut, drawing the drapes immediately after.

Dan rests his hand on Phil's shoulder reassuringly, and Phil smiles. As they exit the core of the city, the other Banditos lowers her mask, and Phil realises he recognises every single one.

There's Louise Pentland, with her blonde hair and lightly flushed face. There's Troye Sivan, with his sweat-soaked brown curls, Tyler Oakley's platinum blond hair shining in the torch light a few feet away. Chris Kendall's catlike eyes reflect the firey light in an eerie manner, but PJ's green ones are warm.

And then Daniel Howell.

Phil can't tell how badly he missed this man. His brown curls lie over his forehead in a way Phil's seen more times than he can count. The yellow strips somehow accent the undertones of his skin, and he looks at peace despite the enormous stress he must be feeling.

Somehow that makes Phil feel even better.

As the Banditos make their way through the rocky terrain of the outskirts of Dema, Phil feels someone place something on his shoulders. A quick glance reveals it.

Yellow tape, marking him as one of the group.


	3. A Death

Phil follows Dan into the caves, the darkness even heavier here. Dan is in his element here- in charge- and Phil is grateful. Dan is a natural leader, and that's beneficial because no one else here is- least of all Phil. Even just the thought of being in the eye of public scorn makes Phil uneasy, and that's part of the reason he stayed in Dema so long, why he told his friends and family to go on without him. It had been incredibly reluctantly, and not without a fight, but they'd eventually agreed, telling Phil they'd be back.

The sound of a stick snapping makes both Phil and Troye jump, but it's only Louise. Phil walks a little faster, holding onto Dan's sleeve tightly. Dan raises an eyebrow, but he doesn't pull away, so Phil keeps a vice-like grip.

The tunnels seem endless, but eventually the dim star lit night sky becomes visible again, and the Banditos exit the narrow tunnel. Phil looks up at the cliffs above him, grinning widely.

Their escape.

Dan is showing Phil how to climb the steep edges when when the sharp cry of a vulture tears through the air. Dan's eyes widen in fear, and he points at an old car. Phil frowns as Dan pushes him towards it quickly, opening the back door and shoving Phil inside and shutting it. Phil yelps as he lands on the floorboard, but in the time it takes him to manage sitting up and climbing back up onto the actual seat, Dan has slid a key info the ignition, started the car, put it into drive and weighed down the gas pedal. He leaps out, slamming the door shut as the car picks up speed. Phil tries to open the door, but the child locks must be on because they won't open. He beats on the window in panic, and Dan points at the ground. Phil looks down and picks up a small note, slightly crumpled but still legible.

 _phil-_  
_if you're in hEre, it means the wAtchers' vultureS spotted us. The car won't hIt anything due to some a+ programming by martyn. keep an eye on the cliff'S edges for Us. once you see us, Pull the emergency brake. until then, enjoy the ride._  
_~dan_

Phil folds the note and slides into the pocket of his jumpsuit, staring out the window. The fast moving ground makes him travel sick, though, so he moves his eyes to the windscreen instead.

As it turns out, Phil never has to pull the brake, because after several minutes the car begins to break down and fall apart, eventually stopping before the bonnet bursts into flames.

_***_

_~ after ~_

Phil feels like an absolute failure as he stands in front of the nine Bishops, the black marks on his neck feeling like a brand. The silence is deafening, and Phil can only stare at his boots in shame.

So close, he thinks bitterly, tears welling up in his eyes. I was so damn close.

Finally, the Bishop called Keons offers him a piece of paper, looking almost apologetic, and Phil numbly accepts it.

 _Identified as Failed Perimeter Escape by Dema Council._  
_Violation of Section 15398642_14 of Vialist Code of Conduct._

Phil shudders as he reads the words over and over again, as if they might change if he reads them enough times. Finally, the Bishop Sacarver opens the door, motioning for Phil to exit- and he does, almost faster than what might be considered respectful.

As Phil exits the Tower of Silence, he's hyperaware of every stare. He walks quickly, his hand clenched in a tight fist around the Failed Perimeter Escape notice. It's only once he returns to the starkness of his own home that he throws the FPE on the ground, slumping against the front door in defeat as he unzips his green suit. He pulls it off, tossing it several feet away. Hot tears slide down his face, dripping onto his hands and trousers as he pulls at his hair.

_Failed failed failed failed failed..._

The words play over and over again in Phil's mind, driving him mad. He wants so badly to scream, to shatter the silence that earned the city of Dema its nickname, but he doesn't. He swallows it back like a bitter pill, touching his neck. The black marks feel like they're choking him, even though they're only on his skin. Phil rubs harshly as if trying to remove them, but the blackness doesn't come away. Phil stands quickly, kicking the olive bundle of fabric as hard as he can. A piece of paper flutters out of the pocket, and Phil picks it up and reads it quickly.

It's the note Dan left in the car.

The random capital letters seem odd at first glance, but Phil can't help but smile as he realises what they spell.

 _East is up_.

It's an old phrase, one Phil's heard before- a sort of rallying cry for the Banditos. It triggers another thought in Phil's mind.

_Get out. The compass lies. They don't control you._

_The compass lies. East is up._

The sun rises in the east, bringing light to what previously was darkness. If east is up, then the only way out of the dark silence... is up. The cliffs offer the only escape.

Phil swallows nervously. If he gets caught trying to escape again, he'll probably die. There's no forgiveness for those foolish enough to break the Code twice.

And yet... does he really want to live and die trapped in silence, marked as a disgrace for the rest of his life?

 _No_ , Phil decides. _I don't. Screw it._

He picks up his jumpsuit again, pulling it back on. He shoves both Dan's note and his Failed Perimeter Escape notice into his pockets before walking back to the streets. Phil marches with purpose, stopping at the perimeter of the core of the city. Technically, any point beyond this border is illegal, though the city limits extend all the way to the cliffs many miles away. He hesitates stepping across, but the sight of yellow in the distance makes him grin.

Dan and another Bandito.

Phil doesn't cross, but Dan and the other person stop on the other side, both reluctant to step back into the core of Dema. Phil smiles and Dan, who jerks his head towards the other. Phil gasps, grinning widely as he recognises his older brother. Martyn waves, and Phil swears he could shout for joy then and there. It's been months since he's seen Martyn; they parted ways when Martyn left Dema with their parents. Dan gestures for Phil to follow them, but suddenly his eyes widen and both Dan and Martyn yank their bandanas up. Dan nods at Martyn, who casts one glance back at Phil before taking off. Phil looks back, clapping a hand over his mouth in shock as he sees the nine Bishops marching quickly towards them. Dan looks torn between running after Martyn and staying with Phil, but he must realise he'll never outrun the Bishops at this rate because he stays.

Phil hasn't committed any more crimes; he's not crossed the border and therefore can't be punished.

Dan, on the other hand, has fled Dema on multiple occasions, each one taking citizens of the silent city with him. He's the head of the rebellion, and one of Dema's most wanted.

Dan casts a nervous glance at Phil, his bottom lip between his teeth. As far as Phil knows, Dan hasn't stepped foot back into the core of the city since his first escape. The silence within it is hypnotic and captivating; anyone can be lulled to stay inside.

The Bishops stop at the border, and Dan steps back as the red cloaked men stare at him.

Dan mouths one simple word, not daring to speak aloud.

 _Please_.

Nico steps forward, staring Dan down, and the brunet shrinks back visibly. Phil has never seen Dan cower, but the energy in the air is tense and unforgiving. Nico reaches for Dan's neck, but he jerks back, out of reach. There's a sudden change- one that has Phil wanting to drop to his knees and beg for mercy for Dan's sake. The Bishop Vetomo snags Dan's wrist, pulling him back into Dema, and Nico reaches up and smears his neck with black. His skin is marked a darker shade than Phil's, but the meaning is the same.

Dan drops to his knees, staring at the ground as tears slide down his cheeks. Phil steps back, into the shadows, not wanting to be seen but needing to see all the same.

 _Coward_.

The word rings loud and clear in Phil's mind.

 _It's true_ , he allows reluctantly. It's the whole reason Phil's stayed in Dema this long, why he refuses to speak aloud, why he hides.

One of the other Bishops, Listo, ties Dan's hands behind his back, but Dan hardly reacts.

He's losing, Phil realises. Dan is being lulled back into compliance with the rules of Vialism that he hates so much. He's being pressured by the hypnotic silence of the core, the shame that comes with the black marks, and the hopelessness of being caught by the Bishops themselves.

Dan is giving up.

The wind is picking up a bit, sending shivers down Phil's spine, but he doubts the breeze is the only reason for them.

Even if Dan is in compliance with everything the Vialism Code of Conduct states now, he won't be forgiven. He's been too disruptive to the city and its inhabitants; he's not a conformist, and therefore he's a problem.

Phil's breath catches. They're going to kill him.

It won't be the first time a non-conformist has been publicly executed. The laws state that the black marks serve as a warning, but should a citizen of Dema be caught trying to escape more than once, they will be killed. It's part of the reason it's so important for the Banditos to get away and stay away. The Bishops have no hold over anything beyond the city's edge, past the Trench.

Listo yanks Dan to his feet, and the tall brunet audibly growls. The sound is like a gunshot in the eerie silence that always surrounds Dema, and Phil can't help but smile.

So he _is_ still fighting.

Good, because Phil is not.

***

Phil shoves his hands in his pockets, pacing along the border line. The Bishops have Dan, the Banditos are miles away, and Phil has exactly zero chances left to mess up before he dies.

Phil whimpers softly, but no one seems to hear.

There's no one near enough to hear.

He is alone. Completely and totally alone in an unforgiving society that would sooner see people like him dead than so much as smile at him.

Phil swallows nervously, pulling at his olive sleeves. The yellow tape is beginning to peel off, so he smoothes it back on- not that it matters anymore. The Watchers aren't his main worry right now, any way.

Dan is.

 _So, what are you going to do then, Phil?_ he asks himself.

The answer Phil comes up with is _I don't know._

There's nothing left, nothing he can do.

Well, that's not entirely true.

Phil's blue eyes land on a slightly frayed rope. One of the Bishops must have dropped it. He looks up at the arches that mark the city border. If he stands on his toes, he's only about half a foot short of reaching the underside. There's a hook, for lanterns.

A sickeningly horrible idea creeps into Phil's head, and he steps backwards.

_No._

_But why not?_ a small voice in the back of his head pipes up. _You want out. This is a way_.

Phil gulps, pulling nervously at the collar of his jumpsuit as he kneels and picks up the rope. His hands shake as he knots and loops it until it becomes a decent hangman's noose.

The rope feels like it weighs a ton.

Is this really the only way out? Phil isn't sure what's on the other side of the thin veil that separates the living from the dead, but he bets it can't be any worse than the restrictive, totalitarian city of Dema.

Trembling, Phil drags a brick shaped rock beneath the arch, and stands on his toes as he attaches the noose to the hook.

Sitting on the rock beneath it, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out the Failed Perimeter Escape notice and pen. He flips it over, onto the blank side, and scribbles a quick note.

It seems fitting that Phil Lester, of all people, would die right at the border of the core of Dema.

Phil's hands shake as he steps forward and slips his head through the noose. His heart rate picks up as he reaches back and tightens the rope, his breathing strained and wheezy already.

 _There's nothing left_ , he reminds himself. _Dan's gone, you're a disgrace, and all your family has left you_.

Phil lets out a small cry, the sound splitting the silent air. Hands trembling, he reaches into his pocket. Phil feels a slight sting and removes his hand, looking at the blood running down his fingers. Frowning, Phil returns his hand and pulls out a razor blade.

So that's where it one went. Seeing as the things are outlawed, Phil's kept this one hidden for months. It's blade is slightly discoloured, but it's not rusted or damaged. Phil bites his lip, pushing up his sleeve a bit and pressing it to his wrist before yanking it across. The thin white marks of old scars line mar the slightly translucent skin- places that show when Phil needed to feel something, to be reminded that the numbness suffocating him was only in his head.

Phil blinks as red blood flows down his arm, trickling off his fingertips and pooling on the ground like ink. The wound is a bit deeper than he'd intended to make it, but Phil can't be arsed to care. Who cares if he bleeds out?

Phil pulls out the note he wrote, using a pin to attach it to the bottom of his shirt. He's aware of the bloody fingerprints staining both his clothes and the note.

 _It doesn't matter_ , Phil thinks. _It's not as if anyone will care enough to read it. And why should they? I'm not important_.

Closing his eyes, Phil kicks the rock beneath his feet away, and he can't help the panic that courses through his body as he falls and the rope tightens, cutting off his air supply. Instinctively, Phil reaches up to claw at the rope, but it's just that- survival instinct.

Phil has no will to live in this broken, tyrannical society, and there's no way out but up.

So he's taking that route. Why not? He'd die anyway if he tried to leave again, so he's not giving the Bishops the satisfaction of killing him.

 _And yet_ , Phil thinks hazily several minutes later, his eyes closing as black spots dance over his vision, _I guess I am, in a way_.

***

Dan is trying hard not to curse as he stumbles forward blindly, one of the nine Bishop keeping a tight grip on his bound arms. He's somewhere outside; he can feel the slight breeze and cool mist of rain on his skin. He's suddenly forced to stop. The Bishop releases his arms, and then he hears a sound like fabric rustling. The fabric hood is removed, and Dan almost throws up at the sight in front of him.

 _No_ , he thinks, his eyes wide. _He can't have done that of all things._

Phil's body is hanging limply by a rope around his neck, swaying slightly in the wind. The black marks on his neck are visible beneath the frayed rope, though Dan is sure some of them are bruises now, and a bloodstained note is pinned to his shirt. His eyes are opened just slightly, something almost reminiscent of contentment on his face. Drying blood colours his arms and hands a crimson red, and there's a small puddle of the stuff on the stone ground. Dan can see a razor blade at Phil's feet, coated in congealed blood.

Dan tries to step back, repulsed, but something tightens slightly around his own throat and he gasps in shock.

 _No. No, no no no no_.

Dan struggles against the ropes binding his wrists as he tries to slip his head free, but he can't get out.

 _Oh, this is cruel_.

Dan's eyes aren't on the people behind him, filling the square. His eyes are on the man that was his best friend, the man he swore he'd get out of here.

Looks like Phil got tired of waiting.

This execution is especially cruel in Dan's mind, and it's nothing to do with the fact that it's his own. No, it's the fact that the Bishops have chosen to kill him in the same manner his best friend took his life.

The rope tightens a bit more at Dan's neck as Reisdro cuts the fabric of his green and yellow jumpsuit, yanking the tattered remains off his body roughly and throwing it to the ground of the square.

Even without words, the meaning is clear- _this is what happens to the people foolish enough to challenge the Bishops' authority._

Dan closes his eyes in fear, taking short gasping breaths. He grips the hem of his black shirt tightly, bracing himself for the inevitable.

He feels one of the Bishops moving beside him, but he doesn't open his eyes. He only allows the Bishop to drag him forward, the rope around his neck acting like a sort of leash, and then he's forced up onto a stand of sorts. Dan still doesn't open his eyes, at least not until he feels something hit his side gently. He turns to look, and only the tightening of the noose as whatever he's standing on is removed keeps him from crying brokenly as he sees Phil's body beside him.

How Phil willingly took this route, Dan is unsure. It's horribly painful for his whole body weight to be supported by nothing more than the chafing rope around his neck, his lungs searching for air where there is none. Dan can't help but stretch his legs towards the ground, trying to take some of the pressure off and take in even the faintest gasp of air. He can't reach, though, and with his hands tied behind his back he can't even try to loosen the rope.

_Well, that's the whole point._

Dan is sure that if he weren't dying in a slow and agonising way, he'd be having a breakdown right now. As it is, he's not necessarily calm, but he can't exactly scream and fight.

Dan tries to force himself to try to keep calm despite the searing pain in his chest. His eyes land on the bloodstained paper attached to Phil's shirt, and he reads.

_it doEsn't matter Anymore, what they tell uS. they lie. dema don't conTrol us. we're the ones In control of ourSelves. get oUt and wake uP._

Dan is feeling incredibly groggy, every fibre of his being pleading for oxygen.

 _East is up_ , his hazy brain offers idly.

 _Yeah_ , he agrees with himself. _Let me fly from the fire._


End file.
